top of page

Our "Politeness" is Killing Us

Updated: Dec 20, 2021

As women, we have been deeply conditioned to be polite at all costs.

A man compliments you? Smile and say “thank you”.

A man offers help? Receive it with gratitude.

A man gives a kind gesture? Repay him with your own kind gesture.

A man wants a conversation? Give him whatever time he wants.

It’s impolite to deny attention and invasive compliments.

It’s impolite to deny help, even when it’s uncomfortable or unwanted.

It’s impolite to deny someone’s kindness, even when it’s unsolicited and used to make future demands.

It’s impolite to deny conversation, even when you have no desire to engage.

It’s impolite to say NO. And even more impolite to say it TWICE.


We do it without even thinking.

You might say I’m being dramatic, but it is this very conditioning that gets women raped, murdered, and taken advantage of in abusive relationships. And although I understand this sounds dramatic, real statistics say otherwise.

We are SO afraid of appearing “rude”, we go against our intuition over and over again. That little internal compass - intuition - is whispering subtle truths CONSTANTLY.

Something just feels ICKY about that compliment.

Something about that kindness feels like coercion.

Something about that conversation feels very one sided.

Something feels off.

Something feels deceptive.

Something feels incomplete.

Something feels invasive.

Something feels pushy.


We have been taught to suppress it for millennia.

Dare to be impolite, Goddess. The days of self-betrayal are over.

Your inner wisdom is at your constant service, as inconvenient as it may seem. Are you listening?

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page