“She’s been married three times.”
“She could’ve tried more to save the marriage.”
“She needs to learn how to choose better men.”
“If she had gotten better counseling, advice, support groups, that would’ve saved her relationship.”
“If she would’ve worked harder on herself and her happiness, she could have learned to be happy in her marriage.”
“Something must be wrong with her because she failed at keeping her marriage together.”
Our judgment of those who “fail” to make their marriage work is DESTRUCTIVE.
No amount of self development would have made him prioritize their relationship.
No amount of patience would have made him respect her.
No amount of pleading would have made him less angry.
No amount of convincing would have made him prioritize his health and growth.
No amount of forgiveness would have made him see the pain he’s caused.
No amount of prayers will bring back “the man he used to be”.
No amount of pain would have made him stop using, drinking, cheating, or lying.
No amount of sacrifice would have been enough to earn his love.
No amount of her love would have made him show up in their relationship.
Believe me, it’s NOT for lack of trying.
Fuck… I have seen women willing to give their very soul out of desperation to MAKE IT WORK.
But one person carrying the weight of the entire relationship will NEVER BE ENOUGH.
Because a relationship is about PARTNERSHIP. If one person is ABSENT, the relationship DOESN’T EXIST. Only the illusion of it does.
And yet, here we are, telling her the illusion of a relationship is better than the truth.
So, instead of condemning women for getting honest, having standards, and having the SELF WORTH to say ENOUGH, isn’t it time we show the fuck up for her, to tell her how much of a BADASS SHE IS for having the courage to face the truth??
Goddess, your relationships DO NOT DETERMINE YOUR WORTH. You cannot love someone enough to make them love you. YOU ARE ALREADY LOVEABLE. Go where the love is. Stop subjecting yourself to a loveless life of abuse, disrespect, and absence. You were built for more. You were built to be LOVED. You were built to be CHERISHED. You were built to be HONORED. <3