You're Being HIJACKED by Your GOOD GIRL

Updated: Dec 31, 2021

We have many identities and roles we have been told we must embody. Depending on how deeply we have been conditioned to believe these identities determine our value, we will obey them even when they are destroying our lives.




A few of the identities we are susceptible to being HIJACKED by are:




The GOOD one


The RESPONSIBLE one


The RIGHTEOUS one


The LOYAL one


The DISCIPLINED one


The RELIGIOUS one


The COMPASSIONATE one


The TOUGH one


The NICE one


The PATIENT one


The POSITIVE one


The SELFLESS one


The LONG SUFFERING one


The KIND one


The EASYGOING one




These identities are POWERFUL and we have learned, from young ages, to let them control our actions. We often believe these identities make us more loving people. We think they correctly guide the way we should behave.




Their voices sound something like this:




“Stop whining. This is just the way it is and you might as well just pretend to like it.” - the positive one


“Stop making a big deal out of things. Cut him some slack on the rent.” - the easygoing one


“A religious person would be more forgiving and give them another chance.” - the religious one


“You can’t think about leaving this relationship. They NEED you. Don’t be selfish.” - the kind one


“They can’t help being sick, addicted, and abusive. You cannot abandon them.” - the compassionate one


“Don’t let them see they hurt you. You’re stronger than this. You can endure the pain.” - the tough one


“You PROMISED to be there through sickness and health. That means sticking it out through the lies, betrayal, cheating, and drinking.” - the loyal one


“You can’t afford to be tired right now. You committed to show up.” - t