You're Being HIJACKED by Your GOOD GIRL

We have many identities and roles we have been told we must embody. Depending on how deeply we have been conditioned to believe these identities determine our value, we will obey them even when they are destroying our lives.

A few of the identities we are susceptible to being HIJACKED by are:

The GOOD one

The RESPONSIBLE one

The RIGHTEOUS one

The LOYAL one

The DISCIPLINED one

The RELIGIOUS one

The COMPASSIONATE one

The TOUGH one

The NICE one

The PATIENT one

The POSITIVE one

The SELFLESS one

The LONG SUFFERING one

The KIND one

The EASYGOING one

These identities are POWERFUL and we have learned, from young ages, to let them control our actions. We often believe these identities make us more loving people. We think they correctly guide the way we should behave.

Their voices sound something like this:

“Stop whining. This is just the way it is and you might as well just pretend to like it.” - the positive one

“Stop making a big deal out of things. Cut him some slack on the rent.” - the easygoing one

“A religious person would be more forgiving and give them another chance.” - the religious one

“You can’t think about leaving this relationship. They NEED you. Don’t be selfish.” - the kind one

“They can’t help being sick, addicted, and abusive. You cannot abandon them.” - the compassionate one

“Don’t let them see they hurt you. You’re stronger than this. You can endure the pain.” - the tough one

“You PROMISED to be there through sickness and health. That means sticking it out through the lies, betrayal, cheating, and drinking.” - the loyal one

“You can’t afford to be tired right now. You committed to show up.” - t